Weekly Blog #19 : ZONED OUT (01-09 / 01-12)

This week... —🩹🩹

was honestly tiring...I AM NOT LOCKED IN BRO...im still on vacatoin mode lowkey....anyways I honestly feel so unmotivated....but its alright....(i think) anyways!!! MOVING ALONG! This week to start off, DIAGNOSTIC. FOR BOTH READING ANDMATH. Im honestly stressing about stuff honestly...for one, our diagnostics need to be over 531 for math...but Im honestly not too worried about bc Im kinda smart...(jk im not I don't know what cos sin log and whatever linear functions are...) anyways my reading diagnostic is suppar easy and Im sure ill breeze through it an get an high score@!! ANYWAYS YB IS DUE IN THREE WEEKS, I NEED ABOUT 19 MORE PHOTOS BUT ALEX GOT ALLOT SO WE'RE ALMOST DONE! also this week i started reading a book I got for christmas, aka "No Longer Human," by Osamu Dazai. from reading the reviews and reading the first 'notebook' in the book, its basically about Yozo, the main character, whose heart was broken one after the other and has psychological breakdowns in stuff...in result he loses balance and falls into drugs and depression. Its a pretty good book! The author, Osamu Dazai is quite well known in Japanese literature but he eventually commited sucide in 1927. I read another book from him called "The Setting Sun" so thats how I got to asking for his other books for christmas. I'm gona probably reread it over and over to get more in depth to the book. Anyways enough about my book chatter...for sciecne and social studies we have projects because of PBL (project based learning) In my opinion its really stupid...not only did we just come back from break and finihs nHD, but now we have to do two more projects?! ALL OF THEM DUE IN A WEEK OR TWO?!? WHAT IN THE WORRLD... oh oh and this week we had the new TV setup. (it makes me nervous) on Thursday I worked box and the new mixer tingy with all the tappy buttons...its not as hard as I thought it would be but the only difficult part is switching from broadcaster 1 to broadcaster two and like not going too fast. we also had green screen background things...PD 3 is a sunrise and a lake thing...ngl its cool but kinda crazy. I saved $182 dollars. I'm actually gonna go insane. THATS ALOT!!! maybe I can finally buy an electric guitar to replace the acoustic one...that my uncle took. anyways i learned some songs on my ukulele...i need to finish my animation..since I was really bored... and I need to do my video essay and get my letter of reccomendation....YK I FORGOT THAT NO SCHOOL ON MONDAY = NO MTSS...im so silly man. OMG AND IT RAINED AT THE BEGINNING OF THE WEEK...on monday! (why couldn't it pour on tuesday...) EVERYTHING WAS FLOODED LIKE I COULDN"T SEE...I was playing in the rain and im surprsied im not sick! 

Highlights... —

not a lot of highlights? I honestly don't know. I've been writing more. its fun. i've been saving my money too. I just need to earn a bit more. ive gotten my yearbook message done, majoirty of the 7th grade mugs done, we need only 19 photos. I've been reading more. I've been staying up more finishing work I need to do. which is good. I'm pretty blankish Idk how to explain this feeling. Maybe Ill read about it and learn to write it out some day. Im moving. Im glad. I hate it in this house. but once I move things will get more quieter which is a positive!!! MOOOVING ON! I also got a shark shirt from my mom bc she said that it couldn't fit my brother...ITS QUITE COOL!!! another highlight is that it was my mom's birthday. Happy birthday mom! Thank you for not forgetting about me with all the responsibilites you have lol! another highlight is that I got jolly rancher socks! from mal and jewelyn im so happy!! I LOVE SILLY SOCKS! another highlight of this week is that NO MAGIC NOTES!! i swear if there were magic notes I was actually gonna rip my hair our lol! FInal highlight is that it rained. I love the rain but hate it at the same time ykyk!! 

Lowlights... —

many lowlights for this week. For one, im getting kinda overwhelmed by the things I need to do.. ITS NOT EVEN A LOT... right? anyways yeah...im trying to mentally prepare myself for this quarter bc like things are gonna get wild. Another lowlight is that...im too worried about my grades. especially math and science. our diagnostic is required to move onto algebra...(i can't mess that up lmaoo0=( and for sciecne our project is worth more than 50% of our grade... I HATE PROJECTS. THIS NEW PROJECT BASED LEARNING IS SO STUPID. like anything can be a project....and now their like pressing on us to work with each other! to socalize! For science its honestly so annoying because I know I'll end up  doing most of the work. ITS LITERALLY SO BORING AND TIRING BC ITS ALWAYS THE SAME YKWIM....the classic group work trope... sigh.. also i fell asleep in majority of my classes atleast three times. In science it was pretty crazy bc like.... I zoned out a crazy bunch!!!!!! and I didn't remember anything that Mr. Heloca told me bro... sigh. I'm definetly overcomplicating things but it just seems like soo much because I know damn well that I am not getting any help at all. I'm just going to be carrying each project like I always do. it makes me quite mad. I feel like im going a bit insane because stuff @ home isn't really fun. I should buy myself a bike (i don't like electric bikes.) so I can just ride around in the middle of the night. hate this week. it felt like forever. I just need something to take my mind off of things probably. $182 dollars... I need to earn 118 dollars. 

Lesson Learned ... —

of this week is that people make excuses too much. I hate people who tell me they're going to do something to help so I decided to not worry about it as much! but in the end after weeks and days and hours and minutes, NOTHING HAPPENS. I have no choice but to take initiative and do everything myself. finding out that there was no progress makes me frustrated. like I can rely on them but...not as much yk/ For one, if you don't know what something is or how to work it, GO OUT OF YOUR WAY TO LEARN! DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH! NOT JUST ME! "i get tthe work done! don't worry!" so hypocritical. sigh...I hate working with people who aren't as cooperative....